Boris Johnson Reveals His Political Hero is the Mayor from Jaws (Not Satire)

A Daily Shunt reader has unearthed a Daily Mirror article dated 4th February 2012 (duplicated on MSN) which says the Prime Minister’s favourite movie character is Larry Vaughn, the irresponsible mayor from the movie Jaws.

Vaughn, played by the actor Murray Hamilton, is the archetypal bungling mayor of Amity Island who puts the economy and his own reputation above the safety of the general public, keeping beaches open while a killer great white shark terrorises local waters.

If Boris is Vaughn, who is Quint?

Addressing business leaders before he became mayor of London, Johnson said, “The real hero of Jaws is the mayor, a wonderful politician. A gigantic fish is eating all your constituents and he decides to keep the beach open – in principle we need more politicians like the mayor”.

In a twisted case of life imitating art, Johnson now finds himself presiding over an island terrorised by a killer virus and advocating the reopening of public amenities despite overwhelming evidence suggesting the threat has not gone away and is merely waiting to strike again.

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Political analyst, John Sugden, said, “should we rename the UK Amenity Island? Should we be surprised by this astonishing turn of events? Is somebody simply playing a huge practical joke on us all right now?”

Johnson went on to say “There was one laudable thing about [Larry Vaughn], and that was his refusal to give way to hysteria. I loved his rationality… He was heroically right in principle.”

Johnson is due to appear on a pre-recorded address to the nation today in which analysts predict he will announce a relaxation of lock down measures and provide some clarity over the government’s confusing ‘stay alert’ message.

Evading the scrutiny of Parliament, the difficult questions of a standard press briefing and releasing his statement late on Sunday in order to avoid a response from critical Sunday papers, Johnson has been described as behaving like a ‘tinpot dictator’.

Meanwhile reports continue to flood in of a large fin sighted off the coast of British society, cutting through the waters of public opinion and dividing the nation into those who see the economy as paramount and those who value human life above all else.

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